2010 – Week 1

First Things First


ept_sports_fantasy_experts-317428934-1284032231.jpg?ymorlvDDaQBg1kH4
Football is back! We’ve waited so long that it’s hard not to be overcome with emotion! 
Of course, the first week always has it’s share of rusty teams who’ll improve and one week wonders who’ll fall off next week. But for now, we’re basking in the glory of Arian Foster and wringing our hands over the Vikings. As for our fantasy teams, Arian Foster owners are still twitching with excitement over the 41 points he put up. Could their opponents even hope to keep it close? Let’s get to the scores and storylines across both leagues.

League of Champions
The LoC got off to a rocking start with five teams scoring 90 or more points. Two teams even hit the century mark! Unfortunately for one owner, those teams played each other. Here are the scores:

The Phantom Limbs – 74
Russ’ Rhino Revenge – 67
Super-lative Muffins – 130
Beer Boys – 100
Wyld Stallyns – 90
Reckless Abandon – 95
we’re coming! – 48
OMG Ponies!!!!! – 74
Nana Nancy Unit – 73
Marshmallow Mateys – 93
diddy – 42
KRUG Kommander – 52
Heartbreaking loss for the Beer Boys this week as their point total was good enough to beat any team except the Muffins (who rode Arian Foster to victory). The Limbs edged out the Rhinos late Monday night thanks to 13 points from Antonio Gates. Also late Monday, Philip Rivers didn’t give the Stallyns enough to pull out a win against Reckless Abandon. In the battle of the exclamation marks, OMG Ponies!!!!! showed that more marks equals more points. Elsewhere, the Mateys looked formidable as they defeated Nana and KRUG and diddy slugged it out in a defensive battle with KRUG prevailing by ten. 
So after week 1, here are the standings:

Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts Streak Waiver Budget Moves
1. Super-lative Muffins 1-0-0 1.000 130 W-1 $100 1
2. Reckless Abandon 1-0-0 1.000 95 W-1 $99 1
3. Marshmallow Mateys 1-0-0 1.000 93 W-1 $100
4. The Phantom Limbs 1-0-0 1.000 74 W-1 $100
5. OMG Ponies!!!!! 1-0-0 1.000 74 W-1 $100
6. KRUG Kommander 1-0-0 1.000 52 W-1 $100 1
7. Beer Boys 0-1-0 .000 100 L-1 $100
8. Wyld Stallyns 0-1-0 .000 90 L-1 $100
9. Nana Nancy Unit 0-1-0 .000 73 L-1 $100
10. Russ’ Rhino Revenge 0-1-0 .000 67 L-1 $100
11. we’re coming! 0-1-0 .000 48 L-1 $100
12. diddy 0-1-0 .000 42 L-1 $100


Premier League
The Premier League had it’s share of week one heavies as well. Here are the scores:
Carl’s Moustache – 53
Monday Night – 96
Careless Blimpists – 153
Pacifist Assassins – 61
The Cutlass Cieras – 50
The Alchemist – 79
Blackhearts – 91
Tony Danza Dominates – 86
Zack Attack – 87
Fumblecopter – 78
Nerd Herd – 60
winners – 55
The story of the week has to be the Blimpists, who absolutely decimated the Assassins. In fact, the Blimpists would have won the game if they only started their two RBs (Foster and Chris Johnson). Monday Night didn’t need MNF to win handily over Moustache. Two auto-drafted teams went head-to-head as The Alchemist beat up on the Cieras (who got zero points from their concussed QB Kolb). Welcome to the league, Blackhearts, who sneaked by Tony Danza thanks to the Manning/Collie combo. Zack Attack used Forte’s 30 to edge out Fumblecopter and the Nerd Herd shook off a bad performance by Shonn Greene by tripping winners. 
Here are your week 1 standings:

Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts Streak Waiver Budget Moves
1. Careless Blimpists 1-0-0 1.000 153 W-1 $100
2. Monday Night 1-0-0 1.000 96 W-1 $100
3. Blackhearts 1-0-0 1.000 91 W-1 $100
4. Zack Attack 1-0-0 1.000 87 W-1 $100
5. The Alchemist 1-0-0 1.000 79 W-1 $100 1
6. Nerd Herd 1-0-0 1.000 60 W-1 $100 1
7. Tony Danza Dominates 0-1-0 .000 86 L-1 $100 1
8. Fumblecopter 0-1-0 .000 78 L-1 $100
9. Pacifist Assassins 0-1-0 .000 61 L-1 $100
10. winners 0-1-0 .000 55 L-1 $100
11. Carl’s Moustache 0-1-0 .000 53 L-1 $100
12. The Cutlass Cieras 0-1-0 .000 50 L-1 $100


Team of the Week
tn96.jpg?ciA0LyMB8aiVgrYKThis award HAS to go to the Careless Blimpists in the Premier League. Upon looking at his week one matchup on paper, John Housenga commented “Projections don’t count for anything, but if Arian Foster pans out, the Blimpists could be a tough bubble to pop.” And verily it came to pass. The 1-2 punch of Chris Johnson and Arian Foster (plus 3 great WR performances) netted the Blimpists a whopping 153 points! This is one of the highest point totals in the history of Hiawatha Fantasy Football. Future foes better hope for statistical regression to the mean!

Housekeeping

It occurs to me that it may not be clear who’s who based on team names. So here’s your cheatsheet:

Premier League:
Blackhearts – Jon Fager
Careless Blimpists – Chris Anderson
Carl’s Moustache – Aaron Winter
Fumblecopter – Andy Kruse
Monday Night – Phil Netolicky
Nerd Herd – Bob Distad
Pacifist Assassins – John Housenga
The Alchemist – Chris Thompson
The Cutlass Cieras – Chris Wachter
Tony Danza Dominates – Eric Miller
Zack Attack – Bernt Eidsmoe
winners – Tom McComas
League of Chamions:
Beer Boys – Hyatt Harper
KRUG Kommanders – Denny DeBruyn
Marshmallow Mateys – Cory Ehlebracht
Nana Nancy Unit – Tyler Leepers
OMG Ponies!!!!! – Nate Edwards
Reckless Abandon – Darren Johnson
Russ’ Rhino Revenge – Russ Nelson
Super-lative Muffins – Mike Devereaux
The Phantom Limbs – Peter Carlson
Wyld Stallyns – Dave Burlingame
diddy – Jim Rieke
we’re coming! – Wayne Thompson
If you’re a week 1 loser, remember it’s a marathon not a sprint! Hit those waivers! If you’re a week 1 winner, remember you now have a target on your back. It only gets harder from here. And can Foster really keep up this pace going forward? Really!?
Until next week, may all your catches be held with two hands all the way to the ground and back up again (apparently).
Commish Peter

Leave a comment or talk some smack here:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s