2010 – Week 12

First Things First


It was one short week ago that Steve Johnson was lifting his jersey to reveal “Why So Serious?” after a big TD. This week:
Johnson had a game winning, overtime TD to beat the Steelers in his hands and dropped it.  It was one of the worst drops we’ve seen, especially considering the timing. The Steelers went on to win the game. That hurt.
What also hurts is getting punched in a hockey fight during a football game, which is what happened to Andre Johnson and Cortland Finnegan on Sunday. I’ve never seen a football fight where the guys rip each other’s helmets off to punch actual skulls. 
I guess this the kind of thing that happens when the playoffs are approaching and everyone is worried about their place in the tournament. I’m surprised there weren’t any fistfights among the Hiawatha Leagues this week. Or were there?

League of Champions
In the LoC, two playoff spots remain open and the top two teams take losses. That means there is currently a 3 way tie for 2nd place with a first round bye on the line. And four teams have a shot at the final two spots in the playoffs. Here are your scores:
The Phantom Limbs (Peter) – 88
Russ’ Rhino Revenge (Russ) – 132
Super-laxative Muffins (Mike) – 104
Beer Boys (Hyatt) – 55
Wyld Stallyns (Dave) – 73
Reckless Abandon (Darren) – 91
we’re coming (Wayne) – 62
OMG Ponies!!!! (Nate) – 93
Nana Nancy Unit (Tyler) – 84
Marshmallow Mateys (Cory) – 67
diddy (Jim) – 59
KRUG Kommander (Denny) – 93
The Muffins are currently the hottest team in the LoC, winning their 5th straight in beating the ‘Boys (though he may have lost Frank Gore in the process). The Mateys took a loss this week to Nancy, who also jumped the Mateys in the standings. Three teams are now locked up at 8-4 with a game to play in the regular season. Reckless snapped a four game losing streak and beat the Stallyns for the second time this year (2 out of their 4 wins)! The Ponies seem to have something going as they put up 93 points this week to beat we’re coming (who have now lost 4 in a row). KRUG found a way to get of the snide: play diddy. Unfortunately, it looks like KRUG will be relegated to the Toilet Bowl this year after a promising start. Finally, the Rhinos! Facing the heavyweight Phantom Limbs, the Rhinos put up their highest score of the year and killed them. Russ hasn’t clinched a playoff spot yet, but he’s right there in the mix. While the Limbs still stand above a mob that’s hungry to take them down.

Current LoC Standings: 

Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts For Pts Against Streak Waiver Budget Moves
*1. The Phantom Limbs 9-3-0 .750 1222 1098 L-1 $25 15
*2. Super-lative Muffins 8-4-0 .667 1175 1075 W-5 $17 34
*3. Nana Nancy Unit 8-4-0 .667 1093 986 W-4 $54 7
*4. Marshmallow Mateys 8-4-0 .667 972 927 L-1 $30 17
5. Wyld Stallyns 6-5-1 .542 1158 1026 L-2 $18 17
6. Russ’ Rhino Revenge 6-6-0 .500 1120 1043 W-1 $2 19
7. OMG Ponies!!!!! 6-6-0 .500 1019 1040 W-2 $56 14
8. Beer Boys 5-6-1 .458 1081 1147 L-1 $90 10
9. KRUG Kommander 5-7-0 .417 981 973 W-1 $34 25
10. Reckless Abandon 4-8-0 .333 913 1100 W-1 $50 9
11. we’re coming! 3-9-0 .250 907 1041 L-4 $45 14
12. diddy 3-9-0 .250 875 1060 L-2 $35 8

So with a game to play, it looks like the Limbs have the top seed locked up by virtue of record and total points (they will play the Muffins next week in a possible Super Bowl preview). The 5 & 6 spots will be decided next week. The big ones to watch will be Nana Nancy vs. the Ponies and the Stallyns vs. the Beer Boys. 

Premier League
Over in the PL, the playoff teams are set and there’s a new top dog in the standings! With seeding still on the line next week, there’s a lot left to determine. Here are the scores:
Carl’s Moustache (Aaron) – 49
Monday Night (Phil) – 56
Careless Blimpists (Chris A.) – 79
Pacifist Assassins (John) – 88
The Cutlass Cieras (Chris W.) -131
The Alchemist (Chris T.) – 88
Blackhearts (Jon) – 65
Tony Danza Dominates (Eric) – 86
Zack Attack (Bernt) – 68
Fumblecopter (Andy) – 112
Nerd Herd (Bob) – 90
quitters (Tom) – 79
The Cieras are no the top team in the standings! By beating the Alchemist and scoring 131, they leapfrog the Assassins. Both teams are now 9-3. AND they play each other next week with the #1 seed on the line!! Talk about drama! The loser of that game may well drop to the 3rd seed if Fumblecopter wins. Speaking of the ‘Copter, he continued his scoring binge in demolishing Zack Attack. The Assassins had their hands full with the Blimpists this week, but they still had a chip on their shoulder from their week 1 loss to the Careless ones. Tony Danza beat the Blackhearts this week and secured his playoff spot as well. Carl’s Moustache has a spot in the playoffs, but he has to be worried after losing a low-scoring affair to Monday Night this week. Finally, the quitters’ dreams of a storybook ending were dashed this week with a loss to the Nerd Herd. Look for the quitters to make a real run at the Toilet Bowl Championship and a ticket to the LoC next year. He’s got that determined look on his face:

Current PL Standings:

Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts For Pts Against Streak Waiver Budget Moves
*1. The Cutlass Cieras 9-3-0 .750 1173 977 W-5 $42 13
*2. Pacifist Assassins 9-3-0 .750 1165 994 W-9 $73 21
*3. Fumblecopter 8-4-0 .667 1223 1034 W-2 $55 12
*4. Carl’s Moustache 8-4-0 .667 1008 914 L-2 $54 12
*5. Tony Danza Dominates 7-5-0 .583 1164 1100 W-1 $62 22
*6. Careless Blimpists 6-5-1 .542 1184 1109 L-1 $80 11
7. Monday Night 5-7-0 .417 958 1056 W-1 $100 2
8. quitters 4-7-1 .375 976 1026 L-1 $53 28
9. Blackhearts 4-7-1 .375 925 1042 L-3 $94 12
10. Nerd Herd 4-8-0 .333 868 951 W-1 $53 10
11. Zack Attack 3-8-1 .292 917 1064 L-1 $93 5
12. The Alchemist 3-9-0 .250 809 1103 L-8 $93 5

So the playoff field is set and we wait on the seeding while The Toilet Bowl teams are sizing each other up to see who’s vulnerable and who’s got a real shot at climbing out at the end and pulling a playoff team down.
Composite standings are attached.

Team of the Week

Russ’ Rhino Revenge! Russ’ team had their best game of the season at the best possible time. Russ beat the top team in either league thanks to Tom Brady and Peyton Hillis. Seriously, with Vick having a pedestrian game this week, is Hillis the waiver pickup of the year now?! Russ picked him up as a free agent when Ryan Grant went on IR. No waiver dollars were spent. Hillis has scored 191 points so far this year. Brady has scored 195. Ridiculous. 


The Texans and Eagles will play on Thursday night this week, so be ready for that. 

Also, I thought I’d go over the playoff setup again. The top 6 teams in each league will enter the “Playoffs” and the bottom 6 in each league will enter the “Toilet Bowl”. 
In both the playoffs and the Toilet Bowls, the top two teams get first round byes. When the dust settles, the team that finishes last in the playoffs will be demoted to the lower league next year. The teams that win their respective Toilet Bowl championships will win spots in the upper league next year. Make sense? So every team still has a shot to make it and every team has a shot to not. This adds a degree of relevance to the Toilet Bowl besides pride!
The regular season ends after next week, so make your final game count!
Until Next Week,
Commish Peter

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