2012 – Week 7



Mark it down: 10/21/12: the day we officially reached the point of saturation on Gangnam Style. Not one, but TWO NFL players used the ubiquitous dance move on the field. First we had Jason Pierre-Paul’s sack dance: 
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Then we had Mike (whatever happened to) Tolbert’s TD dance: 
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So I think we can all agree that it’s time to end the madness and move on with our lives. At least until the next YouTube sensation comes along. 
But on to the real drama. The fantasy leagues were CRAZY this weekend. Let’s get right to the action. 

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Every owner in the LoC is probably very tired tonight since they were all forced to stay up until the bitter end of the MNF game. Here are the scores: 
The Phantom Limbs (Peter) – 64
Wyld Stallyns (Dave) – 65
Blitzkrieg Bops (Mark) – 93
Unstoppable Machine (Tom) – 90
Beer Boys (Hyatt) – 87
Marshmallow Mateys (Cory) – 84
Fumblecopter (Andy) – 91
Cutlass Cieras RIP (Chris W.) – 82

Rüssnôçérôse (Russ) – 89

The Alchemist III (Chris T.) – 88
Bye Week (Matt) – 78
Lightning in a Bottle (Wayne) – 92
The Peacenik Hit-Men (John) – 87
Lucha Libre Horrible (Nate) – 84
Yes, this week’s games were decided by a TOTAL of 34 points!!! Three teams won by a single point!!! Okay, here goes. It all came down to Monday Night Football. As Jay Cutler had a passable game, the Bops pulled ahead of the Previously Unstoppable Machine and held on for a 3 point win! Meanwhile, the Chicago Defense was pitching a shutout and Lucha Libre was racking up the points and pulling ahead of Peacenik!! But Stafford, forced to sling the ball to catchup, was playing to grab a win for the Stallyns over the Limbs, but the Limbs had Calvin Johnson! Meanwhile, Russ publicly hoped that Nate Burleson would have a bad game so he could stay ahead of The Alchemist. Well, thanks to Russ’ wishes, Burleson broke his leg and is out for the season, so the The Alchemist was left one point short of a win! Then it happened. The Lions made one last push for points under 2 minutes to play. Stafford slung the ball and connected for a TD with about 1 minute on the clock. Dave pulled ahead of Peter by a point and it was over. The Bears D lost their shutout and the negative points handed the win to John over Nate. Mike LeShoure didn’t get the TD from close range, so the Mateys lost by 3 to Beer Boys. Whew!!! Those of us who lost are now praying for late stat corrections!
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The only two games that didn’t hinge on the MNF game were Fumblecopter notching his 3rd straight win at the expense of the Cieras and Lightning beating Bye Week by 14 (the biggest win of the week).
What a fantastic week!
Current LoC Standings: 
Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts For Pts Against Streak Waiver Budget Moves
1. Unstoppable machine 5-2-0 .714 692 563 L-2 $13 18
2. The Phantom Limbs 5-2-0 .714 639 535 L-1 $57 10
3. Lightning in bottle 5-2-0 .714 619 559 W-3 $0 7
4. Blitzkrieg Bops 5-2-0 .714 613 599 W-2 $33 20
5. The Peacenik Hit-Men 4-3-0 .571 735 632 W-1 $85 9
6. Cutlass Cieras (RIP) 4-3-0 .571 615 666 L-1 $62 2
7. The Alchemist III 4-3-0 .571 595 617 L-1 $71 6
8. Rüssnôçérôse 4-3-0 .571 557 646 W-1 $68 12
9. Beer Boys 3-4-0 .429 627 613 W-1 $100 7
10. Fumblecopter 3-4-0 .429 621 636 W-3 $86 4
11. Wyld Stallyns 3-4-0 .429 472 590 W-1 $26 16
12. Lucha Libre Horrible 2-5-0 .286 643 623 L-2 $72 8
13. Bye Week 2-5-0 .286 599 664 L-1 $83 7
14. Marshmallow Mateys 0-7-0 .000 502 586 L-7 $91 2

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Strangely, the PL had nothing on the drama of the LoC this week. The closest game was decided by 8 points. And no one has an answer for the Nana. Here are the scores: 
Pulp Extrapolation (Chris A.) – 65
diddy (Jim) – 93
Gyro Gearloose (Bernt) – 74
WHAT!? (Eric) – 95
The Dominators (Spencer) – 80
Nerd Herd (Bob) – 72
The Matchless Muffins (Mike) – 88
Purple Pride (Carl) – 35
Blackhearts (Jon) – 81
KRUG Kommandant (Denny) – 110
you want more juice? (Aaron) – 54
Nana Nancy (Tyler) – 99
El Tigre Chino (Darren) – 95
phillywindsurfin (Phil) – 72
So the big story is that Tyler is now 7-0 on the year. Aaron’s team didn’t stand a chance when Drew Brees put up 30 points. Yahoo projections still give Tyler 4 losses on the year, but the mojo doesn’t appear to be slowing down anytime soon. Next week he draws El Tigre, who actually put up 95 points this week to beat Philly even with Reggie Bush’s bye week still in the lineup! It was Chris Johnson who put up enough points for both roster slots! It’s a treehouse of horrors for Gyro Gearloose, who has now lost 7 in a row after a drubbing by WHAT!? this week. Only one team has had more points scored against them that Bernt has this year in the PL. That team is Pulp Extrapolation, who took loss this week thanks to diddy. Chris has given up 666 points this season so far. Hmm. KRUG was laying it on thick vs Blackhearts this week thanks to Vincent Jackson’s breakout game. His 110 points were the most he’s scored all year while Aaron’s 54 were the least he’s scored all year. Speaking of least, Purple Pride only managed 35 points this week thanks to 3 players being out with injuries. That’s a tough one, Carl. The Muffins benefited and are now throwing the word “playoffs” around.Seriously!?  And the Dominators got back on track this week with a win over Nerd Herd. 
Current PL Standings: 
Rank Team W-L-T Pct Pts For Pts Against Streak Waiver Budget Moves
1. Nana Nancy 7-0-0 1.000 704 564 W-7 $100 2
2. KRUG Kommandant 5-2-0 .714 675 587 W-1 $99 9
3. The Dominators 5-2-0 .714 601 535 W-1 $99 2
4. diddy 4-3-0 .571 669 609 W-2 $100 7
5. phillywindsurfin 4-3-0 .571 663 577 L-2 $100 11
6. Purple Pride 4-3-0 .571 573 561 L-1 $96 4
7. Blackhearts 4-3-0 .571 558 549 L-2 $99 5
8. Pulp Extrapolation 3-4-0 .429 614 666 L-1 $61 15
9. WHAT!? 3-4-0 .429 598 604 W-1 $85 15
10. The MatchlessMuffins 3-4-0 .429 584 596 W-2 $45 20
11. you want more juice? 3-4-0 .429 567 659 L-1 $12 10
12. Nerd Herd 2-5-0 .286 558 615 L-1 $100 7
13. El Tigre Chino 2-5-0 .286 513 628 W-1 $69 10
14. Gyro Gearloose 0-7-0 .000 533 660 L-7 $61 13

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As much as it pains me personally this week, I’m giving it to the Wyld Stallyns! Dave’s team found themselves in a bind this week when Jimmy Graham was ruled out. Dave dropped Arizona WR Andre Roberts to make room for Coby Fleener so he could at least put SOMONE in the TE position. Then he watched Roberts score 16 points and Fleener 1 point. Still, Matt Stafford and Michael Bush came through on MNF and Dave got a win against the only team he could have beaten this week. 
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This Thursday, it’s the Vikings and the Bucs! And the bye week teams are Buffalo, Cincinnati, Baltimore and Houston. That’s actually quite a few good players taking the week off. Plus, with plenty of injuries piling up (like Jones-Drew, for instance) and the 14 team leagues, rosters are thin and any backup players getting starting reps get snatched off the waiver wire in a hurry. This is how I imagine tomorrow morning will look:
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We’re now just over halfway through the season! So this is where the playoff runs officially start. Which teams have what it takes to distance themselves from the pack?!
And just one note here about the Survival Picks game. You’ll remember that all but two people were eliminated in week 3. Well, Bernt and Becky are still hanging strong through week 7!! This week, was epic. Bernt picked Oakland and Becky picked New England. Both games were looking like losses for our pickers, but they both miraculously made it to overtime where both picked teams won! So Becky and Bernt are heading to week 8 and making all the rest of us look like chumps. Well done, guys!

Until Next Week, 
Commish Peter

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