HFFL Universal Blast – Week 7

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Three undefeated NFL teams were all on byes this week, leaving room for some less-than-undefeated teams to beat each other up. Of course, the Patriots and the Panthers were in action and both of them were able to keep the L off their record for another week! Cam Newton is playing very, very well this season and used a hard count to get two consecutive off-sides penalties on Sunday. And here, he showed he’s a pretty good actor too!

In the Patriots game, it wasn’t acting when Julian Edelman catch a short pass, turned it up field and into the hard hitting Buster Skrine.

Ouch! That was like running into a wall! Speaking of which, Josh McCown ran into a wall.

You can’t make that look cool. You just can’t. But you can make getting pushed out of bounds look cool if you’re this guy:

But Sunday’s king of cool has to be the Vikings latest dynamic rookie: Stephon Diggs. This guy is crazy good. You may have seen the amazing catch, but the sharp route was just as devastating:

And, of course, the attitude:

I like it. I like it a lot. At least, that’s what Kirk Cousins told me after he won his game in dramatic fashion. Turn on the sound if you can for this one: 

We do like that, Kirk. What we don’t like is Arian Foster rupturing his Achilles tendon. No one has had more of an emotional rollercoaster of a season that Foster owners. Condolences to Jake, Sam and Nate.

Onward into the Point-Splosion!

LoC Logo

It was a point-splosion all across the HFFL this week! In the LOC, the Limbs were not to be trifled with. Scores:

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Down goes the HitMan!! That’s right, Bret’s team was handed their first loss of the season! And it came from a rather unlikely opponent: No Money Manziel! Sure, Jake is reeling from the loss of Arian Foster, but he’s victorious in his grief!

Elsewhere, the Limbs are suddenly very, very stout. This week, they crushed Butterslide by 84 points when multiple players blew up (including Lamar Miller’s 35!!!). The Limbs are a game back from the HitMan and 3 points behind in total points! Another team with a statement win was Tragically Malicious, with a 61 point thrashing of WOLYA Nothing. The defending champ has now lost 2 in a row and Mark’s team is on a 4 game winning streak! #CutTheCheck may have won last week, but it was a short-lived party as he fell to the ‘Finches in week 7. And the two bottom teams will remain unchanged as The diddy and He’s Loose!!! both lost this week. Hyatt made it interesting on Monday night with Chris Johnson got going, but he came up just short against the Eh Team. Jim didn’t make it very interesting as Alfred Morris laid a goose egg and Bacon got the easy win.

Current LOC Standings:

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The point-splosion rolls on into the EL! Who benefitted from the big numbers? Scores:

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Hey now! Look at the Comeback Kid!! That’s right, Caleb’s team is off the snide with their first win of the year! Ryan Tannehill’s big day led the charge as Caleb rolled over Sesquipetantic. That win, coupled with stagnation from his two closest competitors, jumped him up 2 spots in the standings! Yes, Last Place has attained his namesake with a loss to Hashtag this week and m+m+b fell to The Farce. The scoring crown of the week went to the Cieras with 134 points to beat Turn Down for Watt. Wachter’s 2 RBs (Miller and Gurley) combined for 62 points and Watt fielded two empty starter spots. No contest. It was He-Man handing Nudibranch a loss and moving to 5-2. And finally, the Matey’s have fallen! Randy Ableman rebounded from his first loss of the year to hand Cory his by 31 points. Those two teams may not have seen the last of each other. Could this have been a Super Bowl preview??

Current EL Standings:

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Premier League Logo

Would the Point-Splosion actually work out to line up two heavy teams against each other in the PL? Yes! Scores:

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Finally, a legit shootout, even if it didn’t end up being that close in the end! The Tusken Raiders finally righted the ship after 3 straight losses and got a win. And it was a legit win, taking down the Wonkey!! Matt’s team was flying high, but has fallen on hard times since winning the HFFLUBTotW award, losing 2 straight. This is the worst loss though as his 126 would have beaten ANYONE ELSE in the PL this week. That’s tough to see.

Now atop the PL, the Muffins! Dev’s Brooklyn-based team beat Hugginkiss this week for their 4th straight win and are 6-1! Hot on his heels is Flanders! Flanders put together another big game and beat the Dominators this week. He has the highest point total in the PL right now and a 3 game winning streak! Nana Nancy trails him in the standings after beating Mighty Mouse Rat by 8 this week. It was the Nerd Herd getting back to basics and beating Russ this week by a 3 point margin. And, low and behold, KRUG lives! Denny’s Berlin-based squad rose up and defeated Polska this week thanks, in large part, to an unlikely hero: the Jacksonville defense!??! That’s right, the Jags D scored 24 points this week in Londontown! They may ask to play there for the rest of the year! Congrats, Denny!

Current PL Standings:

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It’s a tie! When winless teams prevail, they deserve recognition!


That’s right! The Comeback is officially on! Caleb’s longsuffering team has finally notched their first win of the season. And it was a legit win too! Not only did he crack 100 points for the first time, he cracked 110 and 120 and 130!! We always knew his roster was better than its win total, now it’s starting to show it. Great job, Caleb! Keep it up!

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And, of course, the KRUG Kommander himself. Denny has been in the HFFL for many year and had his ups and downs. So far, this year hasn’t been kind to our far-flung friend. But this week showed that he isn’t out of it yet! We haven’t heard the last from the KRUG.


This past weekend, there were a number of good teams on bye. For week 8, we won’t be quite as hamstrung as the bye week teams are Buffalo, Philadelphia, Washington and Jacksonville.

The Thursday night game might actually be good this time around! The rejuvenated Dolphins will head to New England to face the undefeated Patriots! Tantalizing!

October is almost over and that means that there are only 2 week left until the trading deadline! Who’s buying and who’s selling?

Six regular season games left! Good luck, gentlemen!

Until Next Week,

Commish Peter

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